Thursday, September 23, 2010

all the recipe posts....

yes, there have been quite a few..... I know.... I know.
but I have come to realize that this past week I have been keeping something from you....
and when I am sad about something....
I cook.
I bake.
I ignore what I need to share.

but it is time.
it is time to see things for what they are,
and move forward.

I will share.
I will cry.
but tomorrow will be another day,
and I will be closer to healing,
than I am right now.

Sergei was a wonderful dog, but also, 17 years old~ and we needed to let her go.
It took all summer- but we prepared to say goodbye.
and did so in a fashion that honored her, and gave us peace.

well, we have/had another dog... Stumpel. Stump was 12 years old, and never knew what life was like without a Sergei. Never once did I realize in saying goodbye to Sergei, that in preparing the family... we should have tried to prepare Stump.
catching snow with O

admiring B's talents
When Sergei left, Stump didn't know what happened. He didn't know where she was. He was beside himself with heartache and worry. When we left- he would whimper. He stopped eating. He never left our sides. He grew weak.....
he just did not want to live without her.
the boys (all three) reading together
We loved him the best we could. We tried to get him to eat. We tried to play with him at the park. He just could not get out of his depression.... out of his loss of love for Sergei.
Last Friday night, as we were getting ready for bed..... Stumpel cried out, and then died.

an afternoon nap
I did not prepare for this... I did not feel ready for this..... I hated that this had happened.

we have spent this past week figuring out this new.... "normal".
I have even been trying to find the silver lining in this....

there is no hair to vacuum or sweep up... but there are now food crumbs.
there is no struggles to get him out to "potty" before we leave.... but I seem to always forget something now.
the nighttime routine is different.
the children are different.
it all is so different now.

So, as this new season of being "pet-less" is upon us.... i find myself smiling at every dog that walks by~ wanting, in desperation, to reach my hand out for a sweet lick, or to rub behind their ears.....
I do not know how long this season will last..... but, it is a season that I do not hope to get use to.
So, Stump.... your heart may have stopped~ but your companionship will forever be in our hearts.

all dressed up
you were a crazy wild dog, full of fun, spunk, great passion and enduring love. We miss you but know you needed to go. Be at peace sweet dog, be at peace.


  1. Oh no. This is tragic. I am so sorry. We are a 2 dog family and when our #1 dog had to go #2 dog had a very hard time. We adopted another quite soon realizing she was just too lonely. Give yourself time to heal. My heart goes out to your family, it truly is a great loss.

  2. Oh my, this is so, so SAD! I'm sending good vibes your way, I know this has got to be so hard on your family!!!

  3. Oh Tif - how awful for you but what an amazing show of love and loyalty....losing our one old dog took a long time to recover from - I can't even imagine the sadness of losing two so close together...take care and enjoy the happy memories, allow the tears to wash away the pain and time to heal - our thoughts and love are with you Em x

  4. Tif...I am so sorry to hear about your dogs! Praying for peace for you guys. Love ya!

  5. oh you so sorry. sorry i'm so late on this, but i know you loved those dear doggies so much. it's very sad to lose those family members. i still could cry over my childhood dog, the dopey golden retriever mix who was my best friend. :( hugs to you all!!