While I was walking with my girlfriend this morning I realized how much I "DO" for my boys. I am a "DO"er... that is so true. I see something that should get done- and do it. I dont think "who else should do it" or "the boys could do this".... I just do it. There is less grumbles, less arguing, and less struggles that way.
we had chores, once, for the boys ( particularly the older boy) but the way I had it put together- it just got to be to hard to follow through on. Not to mention, I just started doing the chores for them... because, I DO, remember.
The chores were not things they did for allowance, but they did have to do their chores to earn the extras that they could do for allowance. Here I am, as a parent, trying to teach my child to be responsible~ but then micro manage and inhibit them.
today.... things change.
today... O is not going to like my friend very much.
today..... the boys now have chores.
This will not only help in keeping our house simple... but it allows the boys to see what needs to happen to make this house work. I am not asking a lot from them, but I am asking them to help, and to be a part of the family in this way. Family times are not always happy go lucky, games, crafts, fun, and outings... they are also, helping, caring, pitching in, and carrying some of the load.
so wish me luck... because this afternoon....
things are changing~
and I sure hope~ the change will be received.
maybe my house will start to look like this~ look at those smiles as the kids work.... one can dream, right?
Oh Tif - I so need to do this - I am a doer too! Hope it goes well, inspired by you and halfway through a two week absence of Daddy (he is in China!) help with chores has just jumped right up to the top of my priority list! :D
ReplyDeleteAmen Sister. I had this realization just recently. My children are not independent and it's my fault. I am jumping on your bandwagon. Taking the reigns and making my kids get it together. Thanks for the nudge.
ReplyDeleteGood luck friend!!! I am considering my self fortunate that Ellie can't do chores yet, so I will most likely be calling you in a few years for some pointers
ReplyDeleteI have just discovered how bribing my 3 year old with some change here and there gets him to do stuff. I think I am creating a bad habit. An allowance was never a word my parents knew of but me and brother certainly knew what chores meant.
ReplyDeleteGood luck. I have been blessed with a do-er in my boy. He loves to "do", sometimes when mommy is not really in the mood for help with "the doing", but then I step back and remember how empowering it is for him to have a job...and that in about 9 years I will be smacking myself in the forehead for not taking advantage of the quiet, freely given assistance around here!!
ReplyDeleteGood luck. As a Dad to 5, I'm gonna guess it'll probably be an arduous journey, but the destination is well worth the effort. Stick with it!
ReplyDeleteGood luck !! All my 2 boys do is create more mess. I do keep trying to get them to tidy but have come to the conclusion that I am the only one who notices the mess. Don't think that they have inherited genes from me on this one...
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