PAUSE. Stillness. the waiting.

I cannot believe that it is already May 1st.

This school year is slowly coming to an end.

The sun is shining more than the clouds are rolling in.

Trips were made, visitors came and left, 

changes have come...

yet our lives have remained.

I have been very reflective these past few weeks....

maybe its the Spring, where things are rising, fresh, new.... ready to start growing.

Our lives have had a strange and exciting pause.

Life change seems to be ahead~ but yet.... timing is everything.

It has me scared and excited at the same time.

Tears of sadness have fallen.... as hope and gratefulness have sustained me.

I know you have missed me~ I have thought of you often...

but it has been in this pause of life,

this season of change,

that I have experienced a calm, a peace...

a simplicity.

It has me feeling closer to those here (even though I am not around)

as well as those near me.

Waiting is all part of the game in life~ 

and anticipation is the gain in that return!

I anticipate communion with you again.  soon.

my friend,

it will be soon.

first days... two weeks late

I am knee deep in figuring out this homeschooling thing.
hours and hours go by.... and the night comes on quick.
I am tired ( oh yes, I am tired!).
But two weeks in, and I think we have a good set of guidelines, a decent structure, and a direction.
Some days are LONG ( too long!)
but, the long days are cushioned with great easy days.
"They" (the infamous they) say to give it a good three months to get into the swing of things....
so being two weeks in...
I am in it for the long haul.

First days of school.

a 3rd grader and 5th grader
2013-2014

B is excited for third grade.  He couldn't wait to see his friends.  He struggled with some large motor "tics"... you know, the typical ones we get when he has changes or unknowns ahead... but they have dwindled down this week.  Hopefully next week they will be every so often... and started into a new normal.  He had the massive meltdown on Thursday night.... whhosh! it was a doozy.  But, Friday was the last day of school for that week.... and we made sure the weekend was super calm, mellow and B directed.  He is really doing well.  He maintains much of his composure during school hours... which is a big deal for us.  He will soon be in a groove and third grade will be a fun year for him.

O is working hard.  The work load that he has keeps him busy.  Both of us are still trying to navigate the program and the structure.  He is getting use to being home. I am getting use to him being home.  The first week it was weird having him in all of my "business".... really weird.  We now have some rules about me being on the phone, What it means when I am doing something and to be patient, and how to start being responsible for your own work.  I know that as we move on~ it will be easier for him to just get things done for himself.... but this is a huge adjustment.... HUGE!  If you ask him how it's going... He says he loves it (let's hope that keeps up!).

but the first days are done... and we are moving through September quick.
I would even say... tooo quick!

my desk is a mess

Like I said yesterday....
changes have been happening around here.
The biggest one is about to take place in the Fall.
I am having to prepare myself.
I have spent the past few days gathering paper work and
information, filling out applications and forms.
We have decided to home school my oldest for 5th grade.

I feel like this has been one of the toughest decisions that we have had to make.
I am so involved with our community school~ and I love volunteering there...
not to mention switching the mom button and the teacher button is not an easy thing for me to do with my son.  My husband, our son, and I have had many long discussions of what this will look like, where we are going with this, the goals, the ideas, the expectations.... being sure we are all on the same page.

our son wants to be educated at home.
So, (after weeks of deliberating)
we are.

This past week, aside from being the first week of summer vacation~ I have been been filing out applications, gathering reports... and all the "yuck" parts of education.... you know... the planning, the mapping, the organizing.  Each night I feel like I have a swarm of bees buzzing around my head~ dont forget this, and gotta do that.

Surprisingly, my heart and soul are at ease.... this decision was the right one for us.  I believe that our son can benefit from this~ and actually, draw the two of us closer.  It definitely  is a mental preparation and shift for me.  My patience, my time, and my character.... will be challenged at times...
but this was also my choice~and my perspective needs to reflect that.
so,
I raise my (very full) glass....
"to homeschooling 2013/14~ Let's crack open a book and learn some stuff"